In a sprawling desert,
You’re my oasis.
I can see you from a mile away,
Distorted by the heat bearing down on me.
I can almost touch you,
And then I realize you’re a mirage,
Coaxing me closer,
Raising my hopes,
Before fading away.
I’m left surrounded by sand,
weaponized by a rare breeze.
It pelts my face,
My arms,
My legs.
Like a million little pins trying to pass through my body.
Attacking my skin,
Already raw and blistered by the sun that was once an old friend.
A sun that’s beat down on the ground so long that it’s starting to crack,
And I’m falling down,
My knees hitting stone,
The palms of my hands colliding with the last surface they may ever touch.
And I try to imagine it’s your skin.
I close my eyes and trace the scars on your arms,
I can feel your heartbeat in my palms as I play with the hair on your chest.
Your chest is where I want to be when I watch my last sunset,
The soundtrack of your laugh playing in the background,
While the sky is painted with as many colors as your hazel eyes.
I wish I could hear your voice,
Smell your hair,
Kiss your neck.
But I’m here,
And I’m burning
And it hurts.
And then he’s there,
Like the first storm that the desert has seen in a hundred years.
Softening the dirt beneath me.
The raindrops kissing my lips are the sweetest thing I’ve ever tasted,
Sweeter than you.
The harsh landscape is transformed into lush grass,
The sounds of bird song and laughter are carried by wind that caresses my face
And the sunsets are so beautiful it hurts.
He’s like therapy,
Wrapping his arms around me,
His hands finding their home in the small of my back,
I rest my forehead against his chest,
And I can hear his heartbeat,
Strong and steady.
I think of yours,
Quick and reckless.
And I know that he’s real.

Written 5-27-17

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